Like most people, I was constantly admonished to “establish far- reaching ambitions”, “realize my self value” and “struggle to change my destiny” since I was a child. Full of fantasies about the future, I tirelessly strived for these goals. I had faith that all of my efforts would be rewarded one day.
struggled on this path for many years, in retrospect, Myself became bruised and
scarred. So I stopped and started to look around. I saw that the “fortune” that
I was working so hard for, was a given for some people when they were born. But
for some others, it was a goal which remained unattainable until the time they
left this world with a bitter regret even if they tried everything they could.
There were others who had been kissed by Mother Fortune, and eventually saw
their dreams come true, but they lost their own identity in the process and never
lived in peace again. However, they were not regretful and believed that this
was the significance of life. They were the successful examples for the future
generations. They despised the losers and hurriedly resumed their journey,
without realizing that when death arrives unexpectedly, it will take everything
away without any mercy. They might never understand that their “success” had
nothing to do with their “struggles”, but their promoting of the misconception
would poison others beside themselves.
are often confused by the ever-changing phenomenon, lost in the memories of the
past and the planning for the future. They are not able to put away their hopes
and fears, and settle down in the present, observing the nature of being with
an eye of wisdom. So they try to get rid of things they do not like and grasp
the things they are longing for. They jump into the abyss of pain without
knowing it, as moths to the flame. Few people can realize that the process of
avoiding pain causes more pain. Driven
by fantasies, they are labouring and pursuing faulty
values. They mistake instantaneousness for eternity; pain for joy, constantly
fighting with the outside world, sometimes even at the price of their lives.
They may obtain temporary benefits, but the course of their life is no more
than a series of comedies and tragedies.
this fast changing world, many people have grown from their humble origins to
become public idols; many people in the high-ranking class
have suddenly become
prisoners. This is an endless circle, but people
keep following the
footsteps of others, without knowing that at the end everything will turn into
dust and be lost in a gust of wind. Things which happen in life are
unpredictable and difficult. Like others, I have to deal with them on a daily
strength of blind action is very limited and too weak to fight with the
external power of society. People often praise pines and cypresses for their
being tall and straight, and use them as the metaphors for dignity and
incorruptibility. But if we plant them into the cracks on the cliff, they will
be deformed and twisted in order to survive, or they will die. No one likes to
face death. This is the common outcome when dignity conflicts with the need to
my eyes, human history is a series of paintings of uncountable individuals
struggling for life, sadness alternating with joy. I have never heard of
immortal trees or immortal humans, but in their short lives, both have to
endure different degrees of pain for relatively long periods of time. That
might be the exchanging of smiles, which are as fragile as soap bubbles and
disappear in the blink of an eye, because human nature has never been changed
by the development of society or the improvement of economic status.
heart is frequently burdened when I think of this! It is the reason that my
care for life is far beyond my love for art. In a certain period of
my life, I thought
art was more important than anything else in the world. Many years have passed
since then. Today, to me, it was only the ignorance of a youth.
I am alone, I often feel helpless and guilty: I have already wasted 33 years of
my life, but I have never been able to bring happiness and joy to people, nor
speaking out with a giant’s voice. I am just an ordinary being in the process
of samsara. If I could use my meaningless skills to comfort the souls in pain
or to inspire the viewers, I will be very satisfied.
Beijing, 15th December 2005